I feel funny

 Haven't we all had those moments where something just feels...funny. Not 'haha' funny. More of a 'something just isn't right.' In the fall of 2024 I was uncomfortable, tired, at times weak, I wasn't working out as hard as I was accustomed to. And there was definitely an increase in the size of the hiatal hernia I'd known about for at least a decade, which was now noticeably visible (to me at least) in the upper abdomen. 

But I also just felt funny. I suppose it would have been more adult of me to find a better word. At this point, I hadn't. I was too tired to think of something more specific. 

One weekend I hit the pain threshold I could no longer tolerate. And if you're reading this and can identify, you know what I mean when I say I can handle pain. 

Discomfort - absolutely not. My throat hurts? I'm probably going to miss work. A pounding headache? Not gonna make it through the day. But pain in my abdominal area...I had been feeling that for months. It's slightly possible I was personally keeping the OTC drug Tylenol in business. But this time, it was enough to get me dressed ("dressed") and into the car for a drive to the nearest Urgent Care with availability on a beautiful Saturday afternoon. 

The doctor on call acted as though I was directly responsible for the reason he was there rather than on the ninth hole of his neighborhood golf course - as opposed to the calendaring efforts of the medical administration staff. 

Despite the (thankfully) brief amount of time we spent in each other's company, he was able to identify that I should see a surgeon and sent me down the hall to have some blood work drawn before my drive back home where I could return to the couch and my pajamas. 

I made a mental note to send my best wishes to his spouse (well, assumed - he was wearing a ring on that finger) for having to spend more than a few minutes with him as I had. And to be grateful someone as grouchy as that was not waiting for me at home. 

A week or so later, surgeon #1 (who was much nicer than cranky urgent care guy but plays a small role so shall just be known as S#1*) agreed it was important to get a scan, which determined that yes it was time to surgically repair the hernia. And shortly after that he referred me to Dr. K (who plays a leading role, but will be known as Dr. K for privacy) who would be the better person to handle said repair. 

As I sat recounting my life's health history, and explaining my pain to Dr. K I remember telling him "also, I just feel funny." And though I cannot remember much of that conversation, I remember him saying 'well, I can't guarantee this (hernia surgery) will fix that but we'll give it a go." 

And so in late September 2024, to the operating room we went. The hiatal hernia was repaired. My mother spent an entire week caring for me (which, God Bless Her, goes from I need you (me) to you're bothering me (me) to it's probably time to go (her.) She offered to stay longer. And she really did mean it. But still. I need my space. And she needed to get back to her own bed. 

*truth: I don't remember his name.